Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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