Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
