we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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