Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
