remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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