If i could tip my vagina, i would.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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