Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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