I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
