Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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