...so i touched it.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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