matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Did I show you my penis last night?
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Randomize
