how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
my being single is dangerous.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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