we were pretty classy up until the second keg
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
