How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Girls should come with a carfax report
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
