Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
