508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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