just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
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