do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
