so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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