This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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