My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
He better not be in your backpack
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
