whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Randomize
