it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize
