i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
