i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
