If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
My feet surprised me
Randomize
