Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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