If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
