Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Randomize
