dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
