So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize
