So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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