I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
