she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
