Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
