i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
