I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
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