party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize