How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
the day after is always just damage control
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
