this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Everything about him screamed your future.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
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