Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize