my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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