Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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