I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Randomize
