Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Randomize
