You can't motorboat a personality
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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