dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
