it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Can you bring me the toilet please
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
