with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
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