So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
